Thursday, April 28, 2005

To err is human -- but to ALWAYS err in Bush's favor? C'mon

I still can't believe that someone as unpopular as George Bush won all those presidential elections. "But Jane," someone told me recently, "If you want to PROVE there was election fraud, you are going to need a smoking gun. My hope is that someone will stumble upon some damning information or say something inadvertently as to how it was done. If only we had some sort of memo from the White House or from Diebold -- like the memos we have about Enron...."

Sorry, guys. I've got no smoking gun. Nor do I believe for a moment that our Dubya is going to stand up on Meet the Press, give us his most winning smile and say in his phony Texas accent, "Yep. I done it. I stole that there election...." It just ain't gonna happen.

If you really want to find out if election fraud took place, all you have to do is Brush up your Shakespeare. Circumstantial evidence alone will lead to Much Ado about Nothing -- and a Comedy of Errors too!

Suppose that Hamlet found King Lear hanging around Lady Macbeth every single time he went to Verona? "What's up with that?" he might ask.

Suppose 95% of all election errors -- from funky gerrymandering to lost voter registration forms to people denied absentee ballots to people not allowed to vote on election day due to lack of equipment to "faulty" exit polls to Rove's weird statement that bases come out to vote en mass at the last minute to illegal campaign contributions to long lines only in Democratic precincts to suppression of the African-American vote to destroyed provisional ballots to inept supervision to corrupt public officials to "trade secret" court rulings not in the public interest to tampered-with source codes to impossibly skewed results -- suppose that 95% of all election errors were in Bush's favor, what would you think?

I would be amazed at the odds of this happening. And I would immediately assume that "Something is rotten in the state of Denmark!" Or Florida. Or New Mexico. Or Ohio.

I asked a statistician about the odds of this happening. "Ten million to one," he replied. The Bush Brothers should go to Las Vegas!

"To err is human." To err that extensively is election fraud.

As Shakespeare might have said, "If you believe that Bush won the 2000 and 2004 elections, you are living in a Mid-Summmer's Night Dream." However, if we follow Richard III's example and send George off to the dungeon, then All's Well that Ends Well.

PS: I thought it was Shakespeare who said "To err is human, to forgive divine" but No-o-o. According to Google, this saying is from Alexander Pope. Sorry, Will.

PPS: Sure, this is a good argument that the 2004 election was stolen. Sure, we got all kinds of great proof that the last two presidential elections were tampered with, assaulted and stolen -- but no matter how MUCH proof we come up with, we will never be able to convince the Tighty Righties that a stolen election actually happened.

Once again, we are back to the realization that NOTHING -- no amount of evidence, NO smoking gun -- will change the way that Tighty Righties think about election theft. So we'd better just forget about them and do our own thing. Let's stop being spineless sheep people applauding the carjacking of America and start leading by example. For starters we could stop calling Bush "President," turn our backs on the K Street lobbies, pass over all the corrupt middlemen and pay our income taxes directly to local governments -- where WE can keep an eye on how our money is spent.

Then we could be REAL Minutemen and stand guard 24/7 on the borders of the White House -- where the REAL undocumented aliens are stealing our jobs.